Saturday, June 5, 2010

My Breastfeeding Story

I thought it was time to talk about my experience with breastfeeding. This is a very emotional topic for me, but I wanted to tell you about all about it and also about what I am trying to do. Maybe I am insane, if you think so, don't tell me! =) haha

Before Caelyn was born, I was DETERMINED to breastfeed. I have no idea what drove me to be that way, but I was. When she was born, I know she had a bottle in the nursery and I was fine with that. I was planning on solely pumping and giving her bottles, not nursing. I had no idea how much I would love it. I fed her a bottle in the beginning. Right after she was born, there were so many people in my room that I felt uncomfortable whipping out my breast to feed her when I had no idea what to do.
After most left, a nurse came in and she was the wife of my uncle's best friend. She helped me; I wish I had thanked her but I was still semi-drugged haha. It was so easy, Caelyn and I were so natural at it.. I was even surprised. She told me to call her when I wanted to switch; I never did, I just KNEW what to do. In the hospital, she took a bottle and nursing both. I wanted her to bottlefeed so I could sleep longer because I was beat; she went to the nursery and I do feel like its important for dads to feed their kids if possible.
We continued nursing at home; I loved it. It was so easy. We still did formula so I could sleep longer and she could nurse for 30-45minutes and still scream and be hungry.
I breastfed for about 2 weeks and had enough pumped, after hours of work, to be able to continue to mix bottles with formula for her to get some a week or so later. I stopped about 2 weeks into it. Why?
I started school again and I was gone. It was so hard to nurse and pump with not my full milk supply in, she took formula when I was gone. It was giving her belly aches. Plus, she is tongue-tied and latching sometimes could be a battle and we both spent hours crying sometimes.
But, I miss it and still do.
I regret my decision but I know it was the best decision to make at that time.
I've been thinking and a friend I know was a breastfeeding consultate and told me if I pump at a schedule that my milk will come back in. She said she had milk for a year before it wouldn't come out anymore.
I think I am going to try. If it doesn't work, I tried right? Its not that I am doing it for Caelyn, although I know it is better for her. I know she did get some and that matters. Not many 20 year old moms even consider breastfeeding. But, I want to do it for myself. If it works, I feel like I won't regret my decision anymore. And if it doesn't work, I tried.
I know a lot of you breastfeed, do you think this will work? I know that adoptive moms and other people have done this. It may seem crazy, but I need some support in this decision. I am only going to try for awhile, maybe a month and if it doesn't work, I will give up.
Advice? Opinions? Thoughts please?!


  1. Talk to a lactation consultant about what you can take to increase your supply, since you haven't nursed in so many months. You might need to take herbal supplements, like fenugreek.
    I don't think it's crazy though; I let Grace nurse a little every once in a while, even though she is completely bottle-fed, just for the comfort of it.

  2. thank you so much for sharing your story! I wish more people did. And I don't think you are crazy at all. Even though I nursed my older one for longer than "normal" I stopped because I felt pressured to. Not because I was ready. All to often the mother is left out of the equation. Do what you need to do for YOU! Keep us posted! :)

  3. Hi - I am a new follower :)
    I think it is totally worth a try. Why not? You won't lose anything by trying.
    And you are right - it seems that few younger moms don't want to breastfeed so kudos to you for doing it when you did and for wanting to try again.