Sunday, May 30, 2010

The Worse Moment EVER.

So, I'm finally ready to post about this. I don't want any mean comments, although I know I won't get any. But this is the worse moment of my life thus far.

Wednesday started off as a perfectly normal, great day! Robert was off, so we made a quick stop at the post office for me to mail out more stuff for (I am addicted, btw) and off we went to Robinson (near Pittsburgh) for a day of shopping fun with Caelyn.
We went to Target for me to get my socks to make babylegs. We went to Once Upon a Child.. no good finds this time around, but I usually do. Shucks. Anyway.. then we went to Happy Baby Company, a store that sells cloth diapers. I love this store, yes I do. I could spends hours there, but Robert probably would kill me if I did haha.
We went to The Exchange so Robert could get a movie. At this point, Caelyn was hungry, so I climbed in my backseat to give her a bottle as we drove to Red Robin to eat. Don't worry - she was in her car seat haha buckled in and everything. I am safe.
We get to Red Robin and go inside. We had a clip-on highchair to use. See, now that she is in her big girl carseat, we lost that infant carrier, so we have nothing to use. She is still too little for the other highchairs. This one has a slight lean to it.
So we clip it on, sit down and order our meals. We are waiting and talking, then it happened. I looked down and saw Caelyn on the floor. I just saw her dress. I told Robert to pick her up, so he did. She started to scream. She had landed on her belly. I stood up and took her from him. I rocked her, soothed her and after a few moments, she calmed down. She even was smiling at the person who came and sat down at the bar beside us. But, she was very upset afterwards and would cry randomly.
She had a little bloody nose.
I was so upset.
After she calmed down, I handed her to Robert and then.. I felt funny. I thought maybe I was going to throw up. My vision went blurry - there were 3 of Robert across from me. I had the worse headache I have ever felt. I was sweating like I was running a marathon and burning up. I was having a panic attack - I know because I have had them before. After about 5 minutes and lots of water, I calmed down. By this time, our food had come. I told the waiter we had to leave that I felt sick so we boxed it up and got into the car and left.
I have flashbacks of looking down and seeing her on her belly. Everytime my stomach drops. I still get so upset thinking about it. My baby fell.
I had snapped her in so.. she must have slid out. There was nothing in between her legs. I should have bought one with something between her legs, but that was my fault.
I can't believe my baby fell.. on tile in the middle of Red Robin. No one else saw, that I know of. But still..
This was the worse moment of my life, thus far. I pray to God it never happens again, although I know it will.
I got into the car in the backseat with her. I sat in the back with her as we drove home and I cried. I laid my head on hers and cried. The thought of her being hurt crushed me and brought out this frantic side of me that I have never felt before.
I had enough sense in Red Robin to call the doctor. I told him what happened and he told me that babies can't break their noses because they have no bones in their nose. He said to watch her and make sure her pupils were dilating. Make sure she was still laughing, and just acting like herself. She was. My mom is a nurse and looked at her when we got home. She is fine and was fine. But still.. I wish I could change what happened.


  1. I'm so sorry that happened. Poor baby girl and poor mama. I was scared for you just reading it. I hope you are both doing ok now.

  2. B-
    Talk about trauma. Let me tell you, watching Grace dive headfirst off the bed, landing on her head, and doing a summersault onto her butt was the most horrifying thing I've ever seen. And I held her close the rest of the night, cried a little, and hated myself.
    But that happens.
    I love you!

  3. I am so sorry & I am sure that it broke your heart to see her like that; I hope that you are both feeling better!!

  4. Do NOT beat yourself up!!!! It happens to all of us. My son fell out of a chair just after he turned one and knocked his front tooth out. My hubby and I felt the same way you do. We were right there!!!! How could it have happened?? But it happens to all of us. Kids fall.


  5. When Emma was 7 months old she fell off of a changing table in the mall and had to be taken to the hospital by ambulance because she had a HUGE goose egg on the side of her head. It turned out to be just a bruise, but it scared me so bad that I had nightmares of hearing her hit the floor for months after the fact. To this day I still get nervous using a changing table when we are out in public. :(